Romance Always!

We went on a little journey in search of romance….and have 7 fresh unusual tidbits to entice you!  Join our tour of insights for always finding Romance.

Start a Joint Diary

 When it’s hard to communicate face-to-face, try writing in a book. Purchase a beautiful notebook or diary, and record your thoughts from the day as a message to your partner. Have your partner do the same.  Even though you can’t be physically together, you will feel a sense of unity by creating this one-of-a-kind record of correspondence. Then, when your schedules slow down and you have more time with your partner, you’ll have a special keepsake to re-read years later and cherish.

Read more at Suite101: Keeping Romance Alive: Strengthen Your Relationship Even When Schedules Keep You Apart http://dating-advice.suite101.com/article.cfm/keeping_romance_alive#ixzz0t9ZddXAo

Keep Him in the Dark
For the ultimate lights-out love nudge, fake a power outage. “Unplug the phone, computer, and TV, then turn off all the lights,” instructs Godek. “With nothing else to distract you, you have no choice but to break out the candles and cling to each other as you tell scary ghost stories…or just plain cling to each other.”

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/tips-moves/285737-3

Share a Book

Chicken Soup for the Soul: True Love (Chicken Soup for the Soul Publishing, LLC, December 2009) is a fun read about dating, romance, love and marriage, guaranteed to inspire a renewed search for that special someone, or open your heart a little more to the one you already love.

Read fascinating stories about how couples met, when “they knew,” incredible good and bad dates, imaginative proposals, wedding day adventures, second chances, the ones that got away, and all the other ups and downs that come hand-in-hand with true love, including great examples of how to keep relationships strong.

http://www.amazon.com/Chicken-Soup-Soul-Heartwarming-Humorous/dp/1935096435

Touch

Plato once said “Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.”  In any relationship touch is as essential as sunlight. A child who walks into this knows his mother by her touch and can recognizes her mother among thousands just with one touch. Touch is a powerful tool in romance. Hold her hand as you shop or walk down to the mall. Hug her when she brings you your bed tea. Kiss him Goodnight. Just snuggle and cuddle on the couch watching TV. Don’t limit the touch to the bedroom; bring it out– of course not outrageously but in a subtle romance reminiscent of your early days of marriage when you couldn’t get your hand off her/him.

http://hubpages.com/hub/HOW-TO-KEEP-ROMANCE–ALIVE-AFTER-MARRIAGE

Flowers

…Make a point to give your wife flowers once a month — on random days. The flowers, from hubby and children, thank Mom for being a great wife and mother.

http://sexsmart.com/article_bringing-back-the-romance.htm

Make a List

Determine what it is that makes you feel attracted to someone. What attracted you to your partner in the first place? What are the things that you find attractive that you would like to see in your spouse? What gets your attention?

http://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/daily_living/keeping_romance_alive.aspx

Date Night

Well, no matter how many articles you look for regarding romance, you will find advice to go out on a date night. Look no further! Out of the Box Dates give you variety, simplicity, plan-free freedom!

Keeping It So Simple in your Relationship Planning for 2010!

Sometimes inspiration comes from unexpected places. Can you get Relationship Planning ideas from Business planning?

I have a friend who shared a blog/website about a company who helps understand human dynamics in business. While perusing a blog on Complicated versus Complex, it suddenly popped into a relationship context!

When looking into 2010, reviewing and renewing your relationship, it is not dissimilar to reviewing your past performance in 2009 at work, and then planning for the future.  In your relationship you can have just as many questions, just as many points you know could use improvement as your business planning process.

• Who’s got time for reflection?
• What should we focus on?
• What should we do with too many expectations and not enough resources?
• How will our environment change in the coming year?
• What patterns will influence us?
• What patterns will we influence?

And you can just as quickly feel overwhelmed with the array of questions you have, turning it into a very complicated process. The interesting analogy here is that while it seems complicated, it could just be complex, and that is a much better thing!

According to Royce Holladay from the Human Systems Dynamics Institute’s blog of December 28^th http://www.patternsatwork.blogspot.com/ Complex Planning can be simple! 

In general practice, complicated and complex are often used interchangeably, but they mean quite different things in the world of human systems dynamics.

• Complicated: composed of many parts; difficult to analyze or understand.
• Complex: emerging from repeated interactions of a few, simple parts or factors.

In fact, she would encourage you to make a single statement as to what you wish to accomplish in your relationship this year.  A single goal or value encompassing your relationship could lead to focus, and some simple repeated actions on both your parts that keep you improving/progressing.

Try one of these vision or goal statements:

• We believe kindness is important in our relationship
• Romance can increase this year
• We listen to each other
• We can take time for Us
• Focus on each other
• This the Year to renew our relationship
• We will enhance our connection
• Any wording that speaks to you both!

Simply find your vision or goal for the year, and choose a few simple actions you can both take/change to make it happen.

Simple statements that may take the complexity of your relationship and help you focus on some key patterns or interactions that will make a difference. And it can make looking ahead seem much less complicated! So, begin to influence the future of your relationship, by K.I.S.S.’ing as much as possible!

Like any New Year’s Resolution you have made in your life, you’ve experienced the forcefulness in wishing to make the desired change work.  And you’ve experienced how it can be lost in the blink of an eye as you find a) real life gets in the way; b) negativity steps in; c) massive rationalization starts. Pick one! For a humorous look at how resolutions are made to be broken, try http://www.powderroomgraffiti.com/live-it/made-to-be-broken.html.

But there are many who believe setting goals is a good thing, even if you only do it once a year.  And romantic goal setting together could really pay off! Making romantic goals together can help you focus your time and energy on what is important to you both in your relationship.

So perhaps this is the year you should sit down together.  If you have a tried and true goal setting system, apply it to your relationship.  If you need some steps getting started, try these, adapted from http://www.howtodothings.com/family-and-relationships/a3968-how-to-make-and-keep-a-new-years-resolution.html

1. Take a relationship inventory together. Take stock of where you are, and what you would both like in your relationship in the coming year.
2. Be reasonable. Daydream for a while, but then look at what is practical and achievable.
3. Go on record. Write down your goal/s. Commit to each other. If you have another couple who cares about you both, share it with them too!
4. Have checkpoints. Break down your goals into do-able chunks and set mini goals for reaching them.  Celebrate small goal accomplishments!
5. Rearrange things.  You might need a new approach, plan, or process to achieve your checkpoints. Be open to shifting things together.
6. When necessary, get back on the horse.  Even if you notice you’ve missed a checkpoint or fallen out of your new process, don’t give up, just renew.  Failure isn’t from stopping; it’s from not starting again! 

So take this Romantic Idea challenge…be romantically resolute! And don’t break your New Year’s romantic resolutions.  Keep them alive and share your resolutions with us…We’d love to hear each one!